Footed Pajamas Are Evil

Last night I dressed Client Two in an adorable pair of Dino footed pajamas, but I forgot something very important. Footed pajamas are evil. They were probably invented by a man who did not have to change a diaper in the middle of the night. Yes, they can be quite adorable, especially when the foot part is a cute little animal. And yes, they are often very soft and snuggly, but they are evil nonetheless.

Why? 

Trying  to get a wiggling, kicking infant to cooperate in a well-lit room when you are wide awake is a difficult enough task, but trying in the middle of the night with nothing but a nightlight while still half asleep is nearly impossible. Factor in an evil pair of pajamas and you have an impossible task before you. At least with a normal pair of non-footed pajamas, once you get the foot through the foot hole, your struggle is mostly over, but with footed pajamas you have to get the foot perfectly stationed in the footed portion. An exorcism might be easier (and by the time you're done changing the child, chances are he'll be so fussy you'll think an exorcism might be needed). To put it simply, there is no way you are getting out of that struggle without completely waking up your infant and yourself completely. This means that it will take twice as long to get back to sleep. 

There are two types of footed pajamas: the evil kind and the really evil kind. The first have a zipper that goes from about the ankle of one foot up to the neck. If you are quick enough, once you finagle those feet into their position you just jerk that zipper up to finish the task. It should only take a couple of attempts. The really evil pjs are the ones with snaps. There is nothing quick about snaps. You not only have to get the foot into position you but also have to align a dozen snaps perfectly before your baby moves again. And just when you think you may be done, a little foot slips between two of the snaps that weren't lined up like you thought. Then, you start again. By the end, if you don't give up, you feel like you deserve a really big prize.

Now, you know what is awesome? Those sleep sack pajamas and sweet pea gowns. They keep your baby warm and comfy but require no acrobatics. In fact, you can even change your baby's diaper without waking him up! Just unzip, change and zip back up! We even have one that unzips from the bottom so we don't have to unzip any more than necessary! 

So, next time you're cruising the baby clothes looking for a gift or maybe even something for your own little one, don't even pause at the footed pajamas. They are deceptive. Remember what the preachers told you- evil looks good but it isn't worth it!