Kidnappers or ER?

I remember the  first time I headed out the door to run errands with two kids. It was terrifying. First I had to get two little people completely ready and out the door. This meant a quick nursing session, a potty break, a diaper change and loading the diaper bag down with enough supplies to survive the apocalypse. Then, I had to load both wiggly creatures into the car, only to unload them, by myself a few minutes later. All of that stuff was just preliminary and time consuming. The terrifying part didn't start until we arrived at our location. I had to watch two kids. At once. I had to make sure that Client One was staying next to the car while I unloaded Client Two and our apocalypse supplies from the car. Then, I had to find a way to safely navigate the parking lot and into the store. Of course, the fun had only begun as I then had to entertain and control two kids, who had no desire to go shopping, while I attempted to get everything on my list. Each kid was like a ticking time bomb. A newborn and a toddler, by myself. It was terrifying, but I did it!

Going to the store with two kids is still a hassle, but I manage it like a pro. Granted, if I can possibly leave my kids with my hubby or one of the grandparents so I can shop by myself, I'll do it in a heartbeat. It takes about 15-20 minutes minimum on a most days to get both kids out the door and in the car, so if I'm taking both of them to the store, I really need stuff. It doesn't terrify me or even really intimidate me. And the stares of other customers don't intimidate me when my kids start throwing a fit in Target either. I've learned and adapted. But yesterday, I found a new type of intimidation with two kids- going to the park by myself.

I have taken my kids to the park by myself before, but that was last year when Client Two was a baby. He would lie contentedly in his stroller, sleeping, eating or playing while his big sister ran around and played. I'm not a hovering mom, but I was able to move around the playground with ease and keep an eye on Client One. I had perfect control over both kids. Things have changed. Now, Client Two is not content in his stroller. He's 15 months old and he loves to run and play, just like his sister. Unfortunately, there is still enough of a gap between their development that they want to play on different parts of the playground. Client One wants to go racing off and play on the parts put there for preschoolers. (Go figure.) She wants to climb and swing and slide. Client Two is interested in the toddler portions such as climbing the stairs, running up and down the ramps, and playing with the built-in activities like steering wheels and music. So, I let them each play on the parts of the playground that they wanted but this meant that I couldn't have eyes on both of them 100% of the time. At first, I tried. I really did. But it was impossible. Why?

Client One is friendly. Like super friendly. This child knows no strangers. While this is mostly a great quality to have, you can understand why it makes me nervous at the park. We've had the "tricky people" conversations and she knows not to leave with anyone she doesn't know or to take food from someone she doesn't know. The knowledge of strangers is there, but that often flies out the window when a new friendship can be formed. Now, I really hope and believe that in a kidnapping situation she would revert back to the "stranger danger" concept, but you really don't know until it happens. If anyone ever did kidnap her we would probably have a "Ransom of Little Red Chief" scenario on our hands. So, when we were at the park, I tended to pay her a bit more attention anytime she starting chatting with anyone over the age of 6. And by chatting I mean voluntarily introducing herself by name and age along with the name of her bear and her brother. It's probably a good thing she doesn't know our address. I'd simply holler something out to her like "Don't leave Bo (her ragtag stuffed bear) on the ground!" so that kidnappers would be aware that I was actively watching her. Meanwhile, Client Two is tumbling down the stairs or taking out another kid. Oops!

Client Two is a daredevil. He sees no challenge as too great. He climbs up the slides, even when other kids are sliding down. He climbs and jumps off stairs. He eats dirt and bugs. He requires a lot of attention to keep him from getting his first broken bone before his second birthday. We've never been to the ER (knock on wood) and I really would like to put that visit off as long as possible. He is rough and tumble and, despite having been walking for about six months, does a lot of the tumbling. This means that on a trip to the playground I have to be near him most of the time to make sure that each tumble doesn't land us (or the kid he tumbles into) in the ER. Watching him play can be a full-time job, which leaves just the occasional glance towards his extroverted sister. Luckily, client One is loud and I can hear her no matter where we are on the playground.

Our trip to the park lasted about an hour. Both kids had a blast and neither were hurt or kidnapped. I managed to find the balance needed so that we could all enjoy our time out of the house. After a few more trips, the park will be just as easy as a  trip to the store. Well, not easy. Going anywhere with two kids isn't exactly easy, but it will be less stressful and less intimidating. Maybe one day I'll even be able to be that mom, sitting on the park bench reading a magazine. Maybe, but probably not.

Four Years and Counting

This weekend, my baby girl turned four. Four. That means that it has been a full four years since I became a mom. Some parts of that day I remember with perfect clarity. I can remember how nervous and excited I was. I remember when they handed her to me for the very first time. I looked down at this tiny little person and felt a whole range of emotions. I felt love like I had never felt before. She was someone I had gotten to know for nine months, yet she looked like a stranger. And she was mine. My baby girl. And now that baby is four. She has grown into a wonderful, creative little girl with a strong mind of her own. She is a challenge and a blessing every single day and I still love her more than words can tell.

Her fourth birthday began like all birthdays begin in our house with a delicious birthday breakfast. Every birthday she gets a birthday waffle complete with a candle. This year, I made her delicious birthday cake waffles with icing drizzled across the top. Once her waffle was ready, Client Two and I serenaded her with a round of "Happy Birthday" before she blew out her pink candle and dug into her waffle, washing it down with a glass of chocolate milk. After breakfast, she got to open one little present to start of her day of birthday fun.

This year, her birthday fell on a Saturday, so it only made sense to have her parties on her actual birthday. About this time last year she won a contest that awarded her a significant discount off of a party at the zoo, so her love of animals was rewarded with a zoo party. Having a party at the zoo made it easier for me since it took a good deal less planning. So, once she was all dressed in her special birthday outfit (complete with a matching tutu, wand, and headband) we headed off to the zoo.

The birthday room was filled with several fun animal themed games, so as the guests arrived they got to run around the room playing. After everyone had arrived, they gathered around to meet a special visitor from the zoo. Our special guest was a kinkajou (or honey bear) who stared back at the group of kids with wide black eyes. Everyone got to learn some fun facts about kinkajous and ask questions before getting to pet the little critter. At first, many of the kids were a little hesitant to pet him, but they warmed up and gave him a couple of gentle strokes.

Once our presentation was over, the children spread out to enjoy some more games before we rounded them back up to hear a fun zoo story. While my mom read them "Goodnight Gorilla" the parents started loading up their kids' plates with our tasty light lunch. I made cute, little peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with little animal faces punched on them and served with juice pouches, chips and applesauce fruit pouches.

After a nice little lunch, Client One got to delve into her present pile. She got a great variety of fun gifts. Next, of course, was cake. As part of our party package, we got some adorable animal cupcakes. Client One chose a chocolate giraffe cupcake. We stuck four animal print candles on top and serenaded her once again before she blew them out. The cupcakes were soon devoured (they were delicious) and the kiddos were off racing around the room again while we attempted to clean up and straighten.

Of course, no zoo party is complete without a trip into the zoo to see all the animals, so that's where we headed next! Our group was a flurry of pink as we raced from animal to animal. We even made a quick trip into the gift shop where Client One got a cute little fox in a little purse and Client Two got a rubber snake. About half way through the zoo, Client Two fell asleep and Client One was waning so we headed on home for naps.

While the littles napped, I did a bit of cleaning to get ready for a second party that afternoon. Since the party at the zoo had a limited guest count, we were celebrating again with other friends and family. I also made a quick dash out to get some last minute party supplies. Our theme for the second party was basically "we have a four year old girl." Everything was pink and purple and shiny. We served up some delicious bbq with tasty sides like coleslaw, mac-n-cheese, potato salad, chips, devilled eggs and fruit salad. Of course, we had another cake. This one was chocolate and shaped like a big pink flower with a big pink number four candle stuck in the middle of it.

All in all, I think my baby girl had a wonderful fourth birthday. She was definitely spoiled and seemed to have a great time. I can't wait to see what this next year will bring! (I'm hoping for a year filled with a few less tantrums.)

Motherhood

Recently, I asked several mothers via multiple social media outlets to sum motherhood up in one word. In many ways, it was a trick question. Trying to sum up something as expansive as motherhood into one simple word is nearly impossible. And yet, as I read through the responses, I had to agree with every single one. Here are the top contenders:

Exhausting
This was by far the most popular response and, to be honest, my first thought as well. Motherhood is exhausting. The exhaustion starts in your very first trimester and never lets up. You stumble through those first few weeks after giving birth half asleep. Even after your little one is finally sleeping through the night (yes, it happens eventually) you are still constantly waking. Sometimes, it is because a child had a nightmare or because they are sick. Sometimes it's just because you need to check on them. But the sleepless nights aren't the only things that are exhausting. You have to keep up with a tiny little person (or two or three or more!) that has 20 times the amount of energy you do. They can make messes faster than you can clean them. They never stop moving so you never stop moving. But if it were just physical exhaustion, it would be easy, but it's not. There's the added emotional and mental exhaustion that comes with it. Why does your one-year-old keep insisting on sticking things in the light socket? Why can't your four-year-old understand that screaming the My Little Pony theme song when you have a headache isn't helpful? How did your baby grow up so fast? When did he start walking? Why can't you get that bloody Daniel Tiger song out of your head? If it isn't one thing, it's another. It. Is. Exhausting

Adventure
Yes, oh yes, motherhood is indeed an adventure! You never know exactly what is right around the bend. Sometimes, it is exciting and a rush. Other times, you make the wrong turn and fall off a cliff. Nevertheless, motherhood is a grand and exciting adventure.

Miraculous
To quote one of the people who responded, "Every baby is a miracle." This is so true. I can still remember the day I became a mom and the nurse placed that tiny, squeaky thing in my arms. She was a true little miracle. I felt the exact same way with my second child. All those tiny little fingers and toes. Those tiny, squinty eyes. And that feeling sticks with you throughout your children's lives. Those first steps and giggles. Getting to watch them learn to write and read. Every little detail and every little moment is miraculous.

Encompassing
Everything you do seems to circle back to the fact you are a mom. It's girls' night out and between your fruity drinks your mind wonders if your littles are safely tucked into bed. It's date night, and try as hard as you might to contain it, you pull up the day's pictures to show your someone special. We can't help it. When those little people enter our lives they permeate every little corner. It's not that we can't be our own people and it's not that motherhood defines us but it is very much a part of who we are. Our children invade every thought.

Empowering
Hell yes! I am Mama, hear me roar! You better not mess with my kids or you will see my bad side. But motherhood is more than just coming to our kids' defense. We literally become super moms. We find strength where we thought there was none. We are the givers of life. We are powerful. Some days, we feel as if we can do anything, You need 100 cupcakes for that bakesale by this afternoon? Done. You need me to change a dirty diaper while simultaneously cooking a delicious homemade dinner and entertaining  a preschooler who didn't take a nap? Done. You need me to run to Target with both kids and make it out before one or both has a meltdown? Well...

Unpredictable
Just about every time you think  you have this mom thing figured out, you don't. Both of my children are incredibly different and I am constantly learning and relearning how to be a good mom. You never know what life is going to throw at your via your kids. Sometimes, it's all good stuff like when your kid decides out of the blue that this is the day that she is going to be potty trained. Sometimes, it's not so good like when you have to cancel your plans because your baby has a 103 temp.

Joyful
I can honestly say that being a mother is one of the happiest experiences. Yes, it is draining and intimidating and exhausting and all of that stuff, but it is happy. If you thought you found happiness or pride in your own accomplishments just wait until your kid does something. The joy that you feel from something as simple as a little giggle is enough to make your heart feel as it is about to burst from your chest.

Overwhelming
Motherhood is definitely overwhelming. If you ever thought anything was stressful multiple that by about 1000. There simply is not enough time in the day to do everything you need to do.But motherhood is more than just being swamped with a million menial tasks. It is overwhelming in the amount of love you feel for your child. It is overwhelming in the amount of pride you feel for your child. Motherhood is an overload of everything physical, emotional and mental. And of course, all the hormones don't help. Motherhood is an amazing, overwhelming experience.

So, in short, motherhood is many things and it takes on many forms. The word you might use to describe motherhood probably changes from day to day, but the fact is that we are mothers.  Here's to the moms who gave birth at home, in birthing centers or on hospitals. Here's to the moms who gave birth all natural, loaded with drugs or who had c-sections. Here's to the moms who gave birth to a child, knowing they couldn't keep it and gave it up to go to a better home. Here's to the moms who opened their arms wide to receive a child who was not their own but who would treated as such for the rest of the child's life. Here's the moms with babies and children waiting on them in heaven, for you are no less a mother than the rest of us. Here's to the moms all around the world with different situations, cultures and beliefs. We are mothers and we are amazing, even on the days we feel like failures. Today is Mother's Day and we are worth celebrating.